when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
Just fucked up my mustache shaving, gonna have to take it off because now it makes me look like a pedophile
FYI your old mustache made you look like a pedophile
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
Randomize
