Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
Randomize
