Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
Randomize
