Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
Randomize
