i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
We're not piercing ourselves today.
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize