Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
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