I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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