Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
Randomize
