It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
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