i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
Today is definitely a "stand over the toilet and pee through the opening at the bottom of my boxers" kind of day.
I guess the silver lining is that having a big dick really comes in handy when you're hungover.
It's a mixed blessing.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
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