Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
i need some magic done to my vagina
We were drunk waiting for tacos and I gave him a handy in the back of the Uber while giving the driver relationship advice. I think I'm handling the whole grad school thing alright.
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
Randomize
