I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
Randomize
