Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
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