When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
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