accomplished twins. life is a go
You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
I'm like, not good at living.
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
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