It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
did you hook up austin?
No! he threw up in my bathroom, made me wake up and order him jimmy johns, beat my roommate with a macaroni and cheese box, and then passed out with her in her bed
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
wow bdsm is so cute
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
Over Bumbled last night. I think I set my dog up on a date Sunday afternoon. I have to drive him, meet the other dog’s dad and secretly drink a bottle of champagne from a “water bottle”. This is not what I expected 30 to be like.
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Randomize