How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
Randomize
