I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
I still have a little drunk in my system
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
Randomize
