Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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