We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
Randomize
