Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
