he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
Randomize