I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
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