I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
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