Is it normal to miss your booty call?
i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
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