I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
Randomize