? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
Randomize
