doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
Randomize
