the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
Terrible idea I love it
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
Randomize
