Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
Four minutes until I can fart!
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
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