Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize
