I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
Randomize
