Hotel room at 3 am. She's 42. Stockings and heels. All because I opened with a joke about cougar hunting. We'll high-five later.
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
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