We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
The homeless woman that called me a "dirty looking cunt" the other day, was standing outside Starbucks today with a sign that said "Jesus loves you."
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
