That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
Randomize