It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
