Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
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