4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Randomize
