i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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