I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
You told him you were auditioning guys for your new show: "So You Think You Can Fuck."
Best pick-up line ever!
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
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