think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
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