Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
Randomize
