Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
She announced her abortion via fbk
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
Randomize
