ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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