We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
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