covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
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