Will you blow on my dice?
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
Randomize
