So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
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