people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
They are going to name an STD after you.
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
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