You work out of a Hotel?
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
Randomize
