Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
I love how my cats smell like pot.
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
Randomize
