..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
My cat gives me a boner
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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