I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
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